To determine whether or not to overturn the principal’s decision on Jim Stack’s hair to donate for charity to make wigs for sick children, the school board will vote on Monday at 7 P.M.
“Had I approved Jim’s request, then I would have students everyday asking if the could also break the dress code,” principal Tonya King said. “We have rules for a reason, and we can’t just go breaking them anytime we want.”
King denied Stack’s request because of the school dress code, which states that boys must have short hair. King said Stack can contribute to Locks of Love, an organization that donates wigs to sick children, by donating money and organizing a fundraiser.
However Stack said, “Anyone can donate money, but it takes time and dedication to grow your hair and donate it.”
Gisel Roco, president of Locks of Love, agrees with Stack and feels more families should do the same because of the little donations they receive monthly.
“I was moved by Jim’s passion to donate his hair,” Roco said. “We desperately need human hair for our wigs.”
Roco said he has to turn down 75% of the request they receive, though he wishes they didn’t have to. Stack said he wants to do everything he can to help out the organization and convince the school board to allow him to grow his hair out.
Stack said, “I hope the school board understands,” he said. “I won’t be hurting anyone when my hair gets longer.”
Stack said he wishes that the school board would make an exception because his request is for good reasons, according to Gilbert Castillo , student council president.
Castillo said, “Rules are made to be broken, and this is a very good reason to break one.”
Although the school board does not wish to comment on the issue, Castillo and the student council sent them a letter showing support for stack, who only wants the best for his sister.
“When we received my sister’s wig, she was so happy,” Stack said. “I had not seen a smile on her face for a long time.”
To determine whether or not to overturn the principal’s decision on Jim Stack’s hair to make wigs for sick children, the school board will vote on Monday at 7 P.M. IT SOUNDS LIKE STACK IS MAKING THE WIG. MAYBE INSTEAD OF “TO MAKE” DO “TO DONATE HIS HAIR TO CHARITY.”
“Had I approved Jim’s request, then I would have students everyday asking if the could also break the dress code,” principal, Tonya King, said. “We have rules for a reason, and we can’t just go breaking them anytime we want.” NO COMMA AFTER PRINCIPAL.
King denied Stack’s request because of the school dress code, which states that boys must have short hair. King said Stack can contribute to Locks of Love, an organization that donates wigs to sick children, by donating money and organizing a fundraiser.
However Stack argues, “Anyone can donate money, but it takes time and dedication to grow your hair and donate it.”
JUST SAY “SAID.” AND IT FOLLOWS THE FIRST SENTENCE OF EVERY QUOTE.
Gisel Roco, president of Locks of Love, agrees with Stack and feels more families should do the same because of the little donations they receive monthly.
“I was moved by Jim’s passion to donate his hair,” Roco said. “We desperately need human hair for our wigs.”
Roco said he has to turn down 75% of the request they receive, though he wishes they didn’t have to.Stack wants to do everything he can to help out the organization and convince the school board to allow him to grow his hair out. THIS SECOND SENTENCE IS AN OPINION. YOU COULD PUT THAT LOCKS OF LOVE WROTE A LETTER TO THE SCHOOL BOARD AND WHAT IT INCLUDED.
Stack explains “I hope the school board understands,” he said. “I won’t be hurting anyone when my hair gets longer.”
JUST USE “SAID” AND IT SHOULD FOLLOW THE FIRST SENTENCE.
Stack wishes that the school board would make an exception because his request is for good reasons, according to Gilbert Castillo , student council president. THIS IS AN OPINION. INCLUDE THE INFO IN THE ADDITIONAL INFORMATION ABOUT THE LETTER AND WHO SIGNED IT AND SUCH.
Castillo said, “Rules are made to be broken, and this is a very good reason to break one.” SAME CHANGE AS OTHER QUOTES.
Although the school board will not show their favor in either case, Castillo and the student council sent them a letter showing support for stack, who only wants the best for his sister. YOU NEED TO SAY “ALTHOUGH THE SCHOOL BOARD REFUSED TO COMMENT ON THE ISSUE, CASTILLO”
“When we received my sister’s wig, she was so happy,” Stack said. “I had not seen a smile on her face for a long time.” GOOD
GREAT FIRST ATTEMPT. JUST MAKE THE FEW EDITS.
In the 4th paragraph from the bottom you need to change the sentence to where it says that he had a good reason. You just have it to where it say he had good reasons when really it was only one.
The first part of your introduction kind of sounded a little wordy so maybe add a comma or add a period and make two sentences.
Just watch your spacing in like 1 or 2 spots I saw you did not space between two words.
Your story really flows together good and I like how you picked the quotes that all go to together and are all based on the same thing.
You have picked really good quotes that all flow together really well.
Good job, you explained very well on all of yours quotes.